Monday, March 07, 2005
You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes....You get what you need.
I spent the day today with some friends, and we went to Kidcity, which I have blogged about before. There were 4 of us who went, and before we went we were all at my house also with my upstairs neighbor with her son. So at one point I had 5 kids around me. I truly enjoyed each and every one, each has their own personality which makes them uniquely themselves. As I watched each of them and how they interacted, I kept comparing them to Princess when she was their age, as she's the oldest. I suddenly realized that as much as we can't choose our kids or how they'll be, we (for the most part) seem to get the child we can handle. Many of you will say well yes, but we raise our own kids in our own way, so of course they're what we can handle. That's true to a certain extent, but we don't have choices in their basic personality. BeeMan who is the youngest, well he's all boy, always gadding about and running. He's rough and tumble and loud. Cute as can be! He likes to be independent, and truly let's you know when you are "crowding" him. How does mom handle this? By being firm, but she gives him plenty of room to try it his own way. The constant motion of Beeman would have been hard for me to handle. MellowBoy is just that, good natured, easy going, always goes with the flow. But he is so attached to mom, I could never see MellowBoy running off as BeeMan does. As much as MellowBoy seems to be the perfect boy, the constant attachment would have made me insane. I prefer a streak of independence in kids. LittleMan, well he's into the terrible two's right now, and wow does he have a temper! He hits when he's mad, which we all know at two is a lot of the time. Mom tries to control him, not always successfully at times, but she is laid back with him, and most times does NOT lose her temper with him, while as I think I would have been a raving lunatic with the hitting thing. LittleGirl is independent, and strong, and sometimes you're not really sure how she feels because she tends to have the same reaction to everything. I like to know what my child is feeling. Then there's Princess, who from day one needed to see new things constantly, has the ability to whine with the best of them, they made the word dramatics just for her! Good natured for the most part, smiling most of the time, and always good for the teacher. I think that her whining would put most of my friends over the edge, but for me, well dramatic comes naturally to me, and I understand her whining. Okay you say, if you had one of the other types of children, then THAT would be what you could handle. My point exactly! We get used to our kids ways, we understand them, we can deal. I think we have all seen the parents who can't seem to get a handle on their kids. Each child was a joy to be with, each one so perfectly themselves. And at the end of the day, I was happy to see each one go home. Mine was in a meltdown as she was overtired, and is now napping. I knew the right words to say to calm her down, I knew when to be firm and when to hug. I knew how to handle her. All of the other mother's know how to handle their own. It's a beautiful thing! I think we all tried to imagine what our children would be like, and I know for sure Princess is not what I thought she'd be, but she turned out to be just what I needed and could handle. Celebrate your child's uniqueness, and celebrate your own way of handling them!
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