Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Holiday frenzy and reflection

At this time of year, it's really easy to lose perspective on what is truly important. We get into this buying frenzy, and there goes our reason, our sanity, and sometimes our compassion (we've all either been that person or have seen that kind of person, admit it). Princess is getting a lot of nice things. I tend to go overboard, because she's my one and only and also because her Birthday is the day after Christmas. I was looking at digital cameras for her, she likes to take pictures and I thought that would be nice. I was looking at the cameras under 100 dollars, and read some reviews on them. Most of the cameras in that price range seem to have problems one way or the other. So I thought well if I spend 20 dollars more I could get her a better one......Then it hit me. SHE'S 4 GOING ON 5 PEOPLE!!!! What kind of a nut am I??? I'm going to buy my 5 year old a camera I would be afraid of her dropping??? She has a perfectly good 35 millimeter camera, ok so she can't preview her pics, but seriously, at 5 she's going to understand that??? I got so caught up in the buying frenzy I lost my sanity for a while. I forget that I have a responsibility to teach my daughter there is more to this season than getting presents. I should be teaching her to love herself and others. That happiness is NOT found in a prettily wrapped box.
I feel I redeemed myself a bit the other day though. I was at the grocery store, and in front of me in the checkout line was a woman who was obviously on disability and also obviously very poor. She had a small amount of groceries, most of it the staples you need in your house. Nothing extravagant or indulgent. She gave her EBT card to the cashier (for those of you who don't know, it's a card the state gives you now instead of food stamps) and was told that the balance on the card was only 8 dollars and change. She looked embarrassed, and said she would have to put a lot of what she bought back. I asked what the amount was, it came to about 24 and change. I paid for the rest of her groceries. 25 dollars will not break me, but it will make a difference in whether this woman eats this week or not.
When I was pregnant with Princess, I was put on bed rest. I work as a hair colorist, and in our business there are few salons that offer any benefits, so I don't work, I don't get paid. I had high blood pressure during the last trimester so standing all day on my feet was not something I could do. I had to go to the state to ask for assistance. Short term assistance to be sure, but I needed it at the time. It killed me a bit inside to have to do that, I have always supported myself, and here I was unable to do it at the time. After I went there and found out that yes I could have food stamps and money for household expenses, I left crying my eyes out. My pride had been badly bruised. I saw myself as a welfare mom. Needless to say, I was feeling very low. Then I got home, and I thought about it. OK I said, you need this now, but you won't need it forever. You pay into the system, and if you need help, the system can support you for a while. It's no different than having family and friends help you. The state was wonderful to me, as were my friends and family. I remembered those days as I paid for that woman's groceries. What they give you in food stamps hardly covers a whole month. If you scrimp on what you buy and buy cheap, you MAY be able to make it to the end of the month, but it's hard. If it weren't for the state and my friends, I wouldn't have made it through that Christmas pregnant and on bed rest. All of that went through my mind in a split second. It seemed the right thing to do.
If any of you are feeling pressured this holiday season, or short of time and patience, do something nice for someone. For what that deed will cost, it will pay back immeasurably in how you feel about yourself and the season. Remember those who have not, because at any time, for whatever reason, we could be the ones who have not. I was for a while.

• Posted By Crazy Single Mom @ 9:37 PM
Monday, December 12, 2005

Princess REALLY believes!!

I thought I would share a few Princess moments from the past few weeks that just crack me up, all holiday related.

Princess is the kind of girl who needs fair warning when things are coming to an end, like bedtime, I give her warnings before we have quiet time and book. Otherwise there is heck to pay! This particular night, I had given her fair warning, but when the time came to turn off the TV and go for a book, she screamed bloody murder. I looked at her aghast and said (in my best stern mommy voice) "Princess, this is not good behavior!!" At which point her face got this look of sheer tragedy and terror and she screamed "DON'T TELL SANTA!!! DON'T TELL SANTA!!" I ask you, how do you manage to keep a straight face with that??

Another time, we drove by the town nativity scene, and Princess said "Mommy I just saw baby Jesus and Mary and God!" I told her that no that wasn't god that was Joseph, Jesus's father. She was quiet a moment and she said "But God is Jesus's father" to which I replied why yes, yes he was. She asked" So who is Joseph then??" I thought hard for a minute, then told her Joseph is Jesus's step daddy. I am SO going to hell for that one lol!!!!

She wondered one day how Santa could be at all the malls,so I told her that Santa was so busy this time of year that he hired people to work for him but that he kept watch over all of them so he could keep an eye on the kids. She then asked if Santa went to any of the malls, and again, thinking fast I said he does pop in from time to time as a surprise, so that you can never be too sure if the Santa you see at the mall is the real one or not. The night I put her to bed after getting her Santa picture taken, she said "Mama I think that was the real Santa!" I told her I thought so too.

I love that kid so much!!!!

• Posted By Crazy Single Mom @ 9:58 PM
Friday, December 09, 2005

All hail DSL!!!

OK so now I am back, I know, I said that before, and you may not believe it, but I truly am now :-) I was without DSL for a while, and try blogging on blogger without it, NOT an easy thing! So much to tell! Settling in has not been as easy as I thought it would be. I love the new house, and I love the landlord. But this is not the area I had wanted to be in, so for a while I felt out of place, and for a really short period didn't WANT to try to like it. That time is over now, and I can see the benefits of living here. For one thing, I can get to a mall in less than 15 minutes and I DON'T have to get on a highway woo hoo!! There is a book store less than a half hour away, and the supermarket is literally down the street. Princesses school which she will be going to next fall is a block and a half away and this is a nice residential area with lots of kids for Princess to make friends with. I am much closer to work now, as is roomie. I did however, manage to totally lose the home phone, as in I don't know where I put it. How do you DO that I ask you hee! This weekend I have to buy a new home phone. There is a lot of positive things in this area, but I still miss my old town. When I buy, I'm pretty sure that is the area I'll be looking in. Pictures WILL come, I just have to organize myself to do it, so soon, I promise. I have to get ready to go to work in a major snow storm right now, so tonight I can't wait to visit all your blogs!!

• Posted By Crazy Single Mom @ 9:44 AM
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